May 18, 2013

how i started blogging...

during the fall season of 2008 i wanted my own email.
after my own email, a blog was made. 
i can't remember what i named it... probably something dumb. 
i posted almost every selfie of myself on it. 
i didn't know anything about blogging, or how big it is.
i just had a pink point and shoot and was taking selflies. oh, and i'd write occasionally. 
give or take a few years and a few more dumb blogs, i made my previous blog.
the original name was "morgs colors" hence the URL.
morgs colors was a blog for all my interests. movie making, photography (i was just starting to get into that) journaling, sewing etc.
and then. i saw it. all the other blogs, that were waaaaaaaay better then mine. i had no idea how to design. heck, i was just using the polka dot blogger templates. 0.o
i was determined to learn HTML . well, first i had to figure out exactly what it was...
one blog that i really liked had a cool design, so i contacted her.
to this day, i am so thankful she spent the time to teach me some basic HTML.
i probably re-designed my blog a million times those first few months. after "morgs colors" name, i changed it to adorkable. adorkable lasted a little while, but in the summer i changed it to morgan elise. i hated it. when ever i hear morgan elise i feel like i'm in trouble. 
my nick name is morg. but people outside of my family weren't very comfortable with calling me that. but it's my name. it's what i answer to everyday. i had a lot of conflict with myself for naming this blog "the morg". but it's me, and i'm happy with it.
almost the whole time i was blogging on morgan elise, i was miserable. i kept trying to be like the other bloggers.  oh i like her design, i'm going to make mine  like that. she has a lot of followers because of her outfits, i'm going to go buy some clothes similar.  that font is popular.. i'm going to get it. 
over and over and over again.
 i was constantly unhappy, because i always felt like my blog sucked, and i only had 11 followers and i wrote like a three year old, and my pictures were lame and so on and so on... and so on.
i was just coming to the end of all that when i started this blog.
i am grateful for those times, because it helped me learn more about myself and my style.
but i'm glad i have reached (i hope) the end of it.
i am a very unique, different, odd person.
that's the best way i can describe myself.
i couldn't find one girls style to copy that was like my own.
their's only one me. *face palm*.
i finally decided to be brave and to be different and to be ok with it.
 i was scared other bloggers would shun my differentness. (is that a word?)

you just have to take the risk of not being "normal" and step out and be brave. be you.

after the past year of reading and following so many blogs, i don't particularly  care for many blogs anymore. my favorite blogs (ever) are mommy blogs. because i feel like they are more authentic and real then the average blogger. i wasn't real.
i don't write flowery sentences, or post quotes from books i've never heard of. i don't post amazing photos and i don't name or design my blog anything popular. i just... share what i got.
and i'm okay with that.
before, i was blogging for other people. hoping people would like me and follow me.
i now blog for me and to document my life. nothing else.
i've actually kinda gotten sick of the whole blogging sphere ..
i make this face a lot. (ignore the caption)
anyhoo, just some stuff on my mind lately. hope this is encouraging for other bloggers who are having a hard time finding their voice.

1 comment:

  1. this is really good, and I've felt the same way about blogging lately, and I make the same face.
    I love your differentness :] it's what makes you Morg